As you know, you cause some things and you are the effect of other
things. You could say that when you are causing things, you are CAUSE.
When someone else causes an effect on you, you could say that you are
EFFECT.
Thousands of people buy motivation tapes because
they want the tapes to make them be EFFECT. They want the speaker on
the tape to fire them up and get them going. They believe the tape
gives them energy.
Other people believe drugs will
motivate them. They want to swallow a pill and then be energized. They
want to be EFFECT of the drug.
Employees who sit around
waiting for the boss to motivate them are also EFFECT. Bosses hate the
burden of having to motivate everyone. These lazy employees prefer to
be EFFECT of the boss and wait for him or her to make them work.
The truth is, everyone can be the source of their own motivation! They can be at CAUSE.
"Motivation is in the future. It's 'What do I want?' 'What do we
want?' That's cause. And if it's interesting, it sort of pulls us
forward to it." -- L. Ron Hubbard
For example, you
may have heard the story about three men who were building a stone
church. When asked what they were doing, the first man said he was
breaking stones, the second said he was making a living and the third
said he was building a cathedral.
Which of the men do you think had the most motivation?
What is the in the future for your activities? What do you want in your future?
If you're not sure, you won't be motivated. If you're afraid you'll
get something other than what you want, you won't be motivated. If you
have little hope you'll make it, you won't be motivated.
If you doubt your ability to get what you want, you won't be
motivated. If you have nothing you want in the future, you will not be
motivated. If you do not find it very interesting, you will not be
motivated.
On the other hand, if you spell out exactly what you want, you are CAUSE. If it's interesting, you are motivated!
Of course, you need to have hope that you will make it as well as
confidence that you can make it happen. But the first step is to
decide what you want.
For example, Jill wakes up and
thinks, "I'm going to run my own very successful company some day!"
She jumps out of bed and races off to work. Chris wakes up and thinks,
"I'm going to be late if I don't get out of bed."
Recommendations
1. Stop expecting anything or anyone to motivate you. No longer
think, "I'll really get excited after someone gives me a . . ." "I
won't work hard until . . ." "My life will change for the better when
someone else . . ."
Instead, take responsibility for being
CAUSE and for motivating yourself. "I'm the one who will get me
excited. I'll work hard to reach my goals. I'm changing my life for
the better."
2. Write down everything you want in the
future. What do you want today? This week? This year? This lifetime?
Keep writing down what you want until you start to feel motivated.
3. Look for things you want that are also interesting to you.
For example, "Pay off my debts" may not be as interesting or as motivational as "Become a debt-free millionaire!"
Happy New Year!
Two Simple Steps Anyone Can Take to Earn More Money
"Money flows toward points which attract prosurvival attention. You make as much money as you get attention." -- L. Ron Hubbard (prosurvival: something that aids or assists you or others)
Step One
First of all, your work, your service or product, needs to be prosurvival or beneficial to as many people as possible. What is the most beneficial thing you can do or create or produce?
You can attract attention by committing a horrible crime, but instead of getting rich, you go to prison. You attracted contra-survival attention. By contra-survival, we mean you are hurting people, not helping them.
You attract prosurvival attention when you help people live a better life.
If you show how you can help people with their survival, happiness and success, you make money. For example, not long ago, computers began helping people and businesses in many incredible ways. As a result, thousands of people in the computer industry became millionaires.
Advertising proves this point about attracting prosurvival attention. For example, "Buy this gizmo because we're a big, successful company" doesn't work. "Buy this gizmo! It will clean your bathtub for you" does work because it's helping people survive a little better in life.
On an individual level, you need to show how you are prosurvival. How you help people. How you help your company, your co-workers, your clients or customers. How you help the world!
Step Two
Now you attract attention every way you can.
Businesses that attract attention succeed. For example, McDonald's and Wal-Mart dominate their industries, but they continue to spend millions in advertising.
You, as an individual, can also attract attention. You simply tell people about your prosurvival product or service. You brag it up!
For example, a friendly, helpful car salesman always wore a green hat. Like many salesmen, he truly helped people. All his customers remembered and recommended him, not by his name, but as the "guy in the green hat." The hat got him attention and he wore it every day for decades. According to car sales legend, he sold more vehicles than anyone in history.
Unfortunately, when you start to attract attention, you might get kicked in the teeth. Certain people will go out of their way to make you shut up. They hate the idea of you succeeding.
So what?
If you respond to criticism by getting quiet, the bad guys win.
If you respond by attracting even more attention than before, you win!
Ten Tips For Attracting Prosurvival Attention
While the best ideas for attracting prosurvival attention will come from your own imagination and successes, the following ideas can help you get started.
1. Spread the news about your good work to everyone at your job, especially your boss.
2. Strike up conversations with strangers whenever possible.
3. Show something unique about yourself, like the man in the green hat. Stand out from the crowd.
4. Go to social events and meet as many new people as you can.
5. Share stories about your happy customers with other customers.
6. Get your family and friends to talk about the many ways you help people.
7. Learn how to speak in public and give speeches at every opportunity.
8. Post your prosurvival ideas on the web (blogs, bulletin boards, forums, your own website).
9. Look and act like a professional at all times.
10. Do things that are so beneficial that others are compelled to spread the news.
You'll soon see more money flowing your way.
Start!
Step One
First of all, your work, your service or product, needs to be prosurvival or beneficial to as many people as possible. What is the most beneficial thing you can do or create or produce?
You can attract attention by committing a horrible crime, but instead of getting rich, you go to prison. You attracted contra-survival attention. By contra-survival, we mean you are hurting people, not helping them.
You attract prosurvival attention when you help people live a better life.
If you show how you can help people with their survival, happiness and success, you make money. For example, not long ago, computers began helping people and businesses in many incredible ways. As a result, thousands of people in the computer industry became millionaires.
Advertising proves this point about attracting prosurvival attention. For example, "Buy this gizmo because we're a big, successful company" doesn't work. "Buy this gizmo! It will clean your bathtub for you" does work because it's helping people survive a little better in life.
On an individual level, you need to show how you are prosurvival. How you help people. How you help your company, your co-workers, your clients or customers. How you help the world!
Step Two
Now you attract attention every way you can.
Businesses that attract attention succeed. For example, McDonald's and Wal-Mart dominate their industries, but they continue to spend millions in advertising.
You, as an individual, can also attract attention. You simply tell people about your prosurvival product or service. You brag it up!
For example, a friendly, helpful car salesman always wore a green hat. Like many salesmen, he truly helped people. All his customers remembered and recommended him, not by his name, but as the "guy in the green hat." The hat got him attention and he wore it every day for decades. According to car sales legend, he sold more vehicles than anyone in history.
Unfortunately, when you start to attract attention, you might get kicked in the teeth. Certain people will go out of their way to make you shut up. They hate the idea of you succeeding.
So what?
If you respond to criticism by getting quiet, the bad guys win.
If you respond by attracting even more attention than before, you win!
Ten Tips For Attracting Prosurvival Attention
While the best ideas for attracting prosurvival attention will come from your own imagination and successes, the following ideas can help you get started.
1. Spread the news about your good work to everyone at your job, especially your boss.
2. Strike up conversations with strangers whenever possible.
3. Show something unique about yourself, like the man in the green hat. Stand out from the crowd.
4. Go to social events and meet as many new people as you can.
5. Share stories about your happy customers with other customers.
6. Get your family and friends to talk about the many ways you help people.
7. Learn how to speak in public and give speeches at every opportunity.
8. Post your prosurvival ideas on the web (blogs, bulletin boards, forums, your own website).
9. Look and act like a professional at all times.
10. Do things that are so beneficial that others are compelled to spread the news.
You'll soon see more money flowing your way.
Start!
Hate
Have you ever hated someone without knowing why?
Perhaps before you hated the person, you tried to help him or her.
For example, Jill says, "Can you give me a $3000 loan?"
You say, "No, I won't give you a loan, but I can show you how to get a raise."
Jill says, "Forget it! If I wanted your advice, I'd ask for it."
You suddenly feel mad at Jill.
"If you think of somebody you hate, you can probably remember a time when you tried to help him or a man like him. Your hatred, actually, is based on the fact that you flopped." -- L. Ron Hubbard
You tried to help someone and you flopped. Perhaps you gave some bad advice. Maybe the person didn't want the kind of help you offered.
Does someone hate you?
Did that person ever try to help you? Was it useless help? Did you reject his or her help?
It's a rotten feeling to try to help someone and fail.
How to Resolve This Hatred
"Pick a person that you've tried to help and get a discussion going on the subject of help. I'll guarantee that if you had a bad time trying to help that person, you're going to enter into one of the wilder discussions that you have been in for some time." -- L. Ron Hubbard
So instead of ignoring the person or talking about problems, talk about the subject of "help." Discuss giving help, receiving help, problems with help and so on.
Ten Sample Questions to Open the Discussion
1. Do you like getting help?
2. Do you like helping others?
3. How do you feel about me helping you?
4. How do you feel about helping me?
5. Have you ever tried to help me, but couldn't?
6. Is there a time I tried to help you, but I couldn't?
7. Do you wish you could help more people?
8. Do you wish more people could help you?
9. In the future, how can I help you?
10. In the future, do you want to help me? In what ways?
"Help is the most acceptable subject you ever discussed with anybody." -- L. Ron Hubbard
Give it a try!
Perhaps before you hated the person, you tried to help him or her.
For example, Jill says, "Can you give me a $3000 loan?"
You say, "No, I won't give you a loan, but I can show you how to get a raise."
Jill says, "Forget it! If I wanted your advice, I'd ask for it."
You suddenly feel mad at Jill.
"If you think of somebody you hate, you can probably remember a time when you tried to help him or a man like him. Your hatred, actually, is based on the fact that you flopped." -- L. Ron Hubbard
You tried to help someone and you flopped. Perhaps you gave some bad advice. Maybe the person didn't want the kind of help you offered.
Does someone hate you?
Did that person ever try to help you? Was it useless help? Did you reject his or her help?
It's a rotten feeling to try to help someone and fail.
How to Resolve This Hatred
"Pick a person that you've tried to help and get a discussion going on the subject of help. I'll guarantee that if you had a bad time trying to help that person, you're going to enter into one of the wilder discussions that you have been in for some time." -- L. Ron Hubbard
So instead of ignoring the person or talking about problems, talk about the subject of "help." Discuss giving help, receiving help, problems with help and so on.
Ten Sample Questions to Open the Discussion
1. Do you like getting help?
2. Do you like helping others?
3. How do you feel about me helping you?
4. How do you feel about helping me?
5. Have you ever tried to help me, but couldn't?
6. Is there a time I tried to help you, but I couldn't?
7. Do you wish you could help more people?
8. Do you wish more people could help you?
9. In the future, how can I help you?
10. In the future, do you want to help me? In what ways?
"Help is the most acceptable subject you ever discussed with anybody." -- L. Ron Hubbard
Give it a try!
Tear Apart Complicated Problems
You
decide to start your own t-shirt business. You get excited about
working for yourself and making a lot of money. So you decide to
take the plunge.
You then wonder, "What do I do first?" You suddenly feel fearful and confused.
You ask a few friends, "I want to start my own t-shirt business. What do I do first?" and they give you several different answers.
You ask a lawyer who tells you that you need to fill out a lot of forms and pay him $2500. Your accountant says the same thing.
You decide to study up on the subject. You check out Amazon.com bookstore and find over 300 books on starting businesses. You call your local college, but find they don't have a class on starting a business.
The more you research the subject, the more confused you feel. You feel like giving up on the idea.
Why?
"THE DEGREE OF COMPLEXITY IS PROPORTIONAL TO THE DEGREE OF NONCONFRONT." -- L. Ron Hubbard
If you can't face something, it gets complicated. It scares you, confuses you, upsets you. Your inability to confront the problem makes it complex.
Starting a business gives you stress. It makes you nervous. Because you cannot confront every part of it, it seems to complicated.
As another example, Pete wants a girlfriend, but every time he talks to a woman, he looks at his feet, sweats and stammers. He is terrified of women. His nonconfront is a big problem. Simply chatting with a woman seems very confusing to Pete.
So he decides to face his fear of talking to women. He starts talking to any female he can. He talks to his sister, an older woman in a store, the librarian, a few of his female coworkers and his friend's wife.
Sooner or later Pete realizes women are just people and not out to hurt him. He enjoys chatting and laughing with them. As soon as he can confront women, finding a girlfriend seems easy to Pete.
"THE DEGREE OF SIMPLICITY IS PROPORTIONAL TO THE DEGREE OF CONFRONT." -- L. Ron Hubbard
People who can take on complicated subjects are not afraid of them. For example, your roof leaks. To you, it's complicated: Which shingle should I remove? How do you remove shingles? Where do you buy new shingles?
But to a professional roofer, the problem is simple. You watch him fix the roof. By watching the process, you confront it. He pulls a few nails, digs out the bad shingles and installs the new ones. Simple!
How to Take Apart Problems
"To take apart a problem requires only to establish what one could not or would not confront." -- L. Ron Hubbard
All you need to do is figure out exactly what you cannot confront and you slice apart the problem.
For example, you want to start the t-shirt business. But instead of swimming in the confusion, or hiring someone to confront it for you, you ask yourself this question:
"What about this problem is difficult for me to face? What can't I confront about it?" You write down five things you can't confront.
1. Signing a long-term store space lease is scary.
2. T-shirt manufacturers seem like mean people.
3. What if the banker laughs at my loan application?
4. I'm afraid I'll hire bad employees.
5. My advertising ideas might make me look stupid.
Just making the list makes you feel better. Starting a business appears less chaotic. Then, you confront each individual item on your list.
You ask dozens of questions about leasing store space. You use a dictionary to figure out every paragraph of the lease. You change a section so you can cancel the lease, if necessary.
Next, you meet with a few t-shirt manufacturers. You discover they are very nice people.
You meet with a banker. You interview a few potential employees. You find out the kind of advertising you need to attract customers.
After facing all five items on your list, you realize it's not hard to make a t-shirt business succeed!
Solve Any Problem
What are the problems you face on your road to success? What seems too complicated?
Take this solution even further. What is complicated about life? Business? Law? Marriage? Politics? Death? What causes complications in this world? Nonconfront.
Take each problem apart by establishing what you can't confront. Write down everything that makes you afraid, anxious or angry. Everything about the problem that is difficult for you to face.
Then confront each piece. Get in there and deal with it. Persist until you can comfortably face each part of the confusion.
If a piece of the puzzle seems too big or complex, break it down as well.
Eventually, through courage, you solve the complexity.
Success, and life itself, becomes simple!
You then wonder, "What do I do first?" You suddenly feel fearful and confused.
You ask a few friends, "I want to start my own t-shirt business. What do I do first?" and they give you several different answers.
You ask a lawyer who tells you that you need to fill out a lot of forms and pay him $2500. Your accountant says the same thing.
You decide to study up on the subject. You check out Amazon.com bookstore and find over 300 books on starting businesses. You call your local college, but find they don't have a class on starting a business.
The more you research the subject, the more confused you feel. You feel like giving up on the idea.
Why?
"THE DEGREE OF COMPLEXITY IS PROPORTIONAL TO THE DEGREE OF NONCONFRONT." -- L. Ron Hubbard
If you can't face something, it gets complicated. It scares you, confuses you, upsets you. Your inability to confront the problem makes it complex.
Starting a business gives you stress. It makes you nervous. Because you cannot confront every part of it, it seems to complicated.
As another example, Pete wants a girlfriend, but every time he talks to a woman, he looks at his feet, sweats and stammers. He is terrified of women. His nonconfront is a big problem. Simply chatting with a woman seems very confusing to Pete.
So he decides to face his fear of talking to women. He starts talking to any female he can. He talks to his sister, an older woman in a store, the librarian, a few of his female coworkers and his friend's wife.
Sooner or later Pete realizes women are just people and not out to hurt him. He enjoys chatting and laughing with them. As soon as he can confront women, finding a girlfriend seems easy to Pete.
"THE DEGREE OF SIMPLICITY IS PROPORTIONAL TO THE DEGREE OF CONFRONT." -- L. Ron Hubbard
People who can take on complicated subjects are not afraid of them. For example, your roof leaks. To you, it's complicated: Which shingle should I remove? How do you remove shingles? Where do you buy new shingles?
But to a professional roofer, the problem is simple. You watch him fix the roof. By watching the process, you confront it. He pulls a few nails, digs out the bad shingles and installs the new ones. Simple!
How to Take Apart Problems
"To take apart a problem requires only to establish what one could not or would not confront." -- L. Ron Hubbard
All you need to do is figure out exactly what you cannot confront and you slice apart the problem.
For example, you want to start the t-shirt business. But instead of swimming in the confusion, or hiring someone to confront it for you, you ask yourself this question:
"What about this problem is difficult for me to face? What can't I confront about it?" You write down five things you can't confront.
1. Signing a long-term store space lease is scary.
2. T-shirt manufacturers seem like mean people.
3. What if the banker laughs at my loan application?
4. I'm afraid I'll hire bad employees.
5. My advertising ideas might make me look stupid.
Just making the list makes you feel better. Starting a business appears less chaotic. Then, you confront each individual item on your list.
You ask dozens of questions about leasing store space. You use a dictionary to figure out every paragraph of the lease. You change a section so you can cancel the lease, if necessary.
Next, you meet with a few t-shirt manufacturers. You discover they are very nice people.
You meet with a banker. You interview a few potential employees. You find out the kind of advertising you need to attract customers.
After facing all five items on your list, you realize it's not hard to make a t-shirt business succeed!
Solve Any Problem
What are the problems you face on your road to success? What seems too complicated?
Take this solution even further. What is complicated about life? Business? Law? Marriage? Politics? Death? What causes complications in this world? Nonconfront.
Take each problem apart by establishing what you can't confront. Write down everything that makes you afraid, anxious or angry. Everything about the problem that is difficult for you to face.
Then confront each piece. Get in there and deal with it. Persist until you can comfortably face each part of the confusion.
If a piece of the puzzle seems too big or complex, break it down as well.
Eventually, through courage, you solve the complexity.
Success, and life itself, becomes simple!
Does Too Much Affection Spoil Children?
People who feel they failed as parents usually share a common regret:
"I did not show my kids enough love."
On the other hand, no one ever regrets giving their children too much affection.
"Affection could no more spoil a child than the sun could be put out by a bucket of gasoline." -- L. Ron Hubbard
Giving a child an unlimited supply of toys and presents makes it difficult for a child to return a real exchange.
But giving a child an unlimited supply of love and affection is something a child can happily return to you . . . in abundance.
This advice applies to marriages as well. A lot of affection might put your spouse into a happy state of shock, but he or she won't be spoiled.
Go try it!
"I did not show my kids enough love."
On the other hand, no one ever regrets giving their children too much affection.
"Affection could no more spoil a child than the sun could be put out by a bucket of gasoline." -- L. Ron Hubbard
Giving a child an unlimited supply of toys and presents makes it difficult for a child to return a real exchange.
But giving a child an unlimited supply of love and affection is something a child can happily return to you . . . in abundance.
This advice applies to marriages as well. A lot of affection might put your spouse into a happy state of shock, but he or she won't be spoiled.
Go try it!
Self-criticism Does Not Help You Succeed
"You
are treating yourself in present time much as you were treated
by others in the past. And you punish yourself far more than
anyone would ever punish you." -- L. Ron Hubbard
How have people treated you in the past?
Have you ever noticed that you treat yourself the same way?
Unless everyone has always treated you with respect and kindness, you might criticize yourself from time to time. And self-criticism or self-invalidation, ruins your success.
False Ideas
At some point, you may have accepted these ideas to be true.
"If I cut myself down before anyone else cuts me down, I win!"
"I respect Joe's opinion. Joe thinks I'm an idiot. So I must be an idiot."
"If I punish myself, maybe others will leave me alone."
"I've heard it's sinful to like myself, so I'd better hate myself."
"No one knows my deep, dark secret: I'm actually a bad person."
Of course, all of these ideas are nonsense.
True Ideas
To succeed, you need to treat yourself with respect and admiration. To succeed, you need a high opinion of yourself. You need to remember that you are a good person.
"Actually you are a giant tied down with cotton lint. You tied the knots and furnished the string and said where you'd lie." "The cold, basic truth is that you are a vital and necessary part of this world." -- L. Ron Hubbard
Three Tips for Improving Your Success
1. Every time you criticize yourself about something, add a solution. Decide on a way to fix the weakness. Focus on improvement instead of problems.
For example, "I'm so stupid! Why didn't I ask him about his other company when I had the chance? No wonder I'm such a loser . . . wait, how can I fix this? From now on, I'm taking five minutes before each important meeting and writing a list of things to do so I don't mess up again. Great idea!"
2. Write down things about yourself of which you are proud. If necessary, start with small things, such as good personal habits. Keep writing until you improve your opinion.
For example, "I might be fat, but I brush my teeth regularly. I'm eating more vegetables these days. I haven't gotten angry at my kids for a month. I'm earning more money this year. I'm helping Joe with his drinking problem . . . ."
3. If you cannot improve your opinion of yourself, the solution lies below your consciousness. Read Dianetics: The Evolution of a Science (free online copy at www.dianetics-theevolutionofascience.org) to learn how you can find and erase the roots of irrational thoughts.
How have people treated you in the past?
Have you ever noticed that you treat yourself the same way?
Unless everyone has always treated you with respect and kindness, you might criticize yourself from time to time. And self-criticism or self-invalidation, ruins your success.
False Ideas
At some point, you may have accepted these ideas to be true.
"If I cut myself down before anyone else cuts me down, I win!"
"I respect Joe's opinion. Joe thinks I'm an idiot. So I must be an idiot."
"If I punish myself, maybe others will leave me alone."
"I've heard it's sinful to like myself, so I'd better hate myself."
"No one knows my deep, dark secret: I'm actually a bad person."
Of course, all of these ideas are nonsense.
True Ideas
To succeed, you need to treat yourself with respect and admiration. To succeed, you need a high opinion of yourself. You need to remember that you are a good person.
"Actually you are a giant tied down with cotton lint. You tied the knots and furnished the string and said where you'd lie." "The cold, basic truth is that you are a vital and necessary part of this world." -- L. Ron Hubbard
Three Tips for Improving Your Success
1. Every time you criticize yourself about something, add a solution. Decide on a way to fix the weakness. Focus on improvement instead of problems.
For example, "I'm so stupid! Why didn't I ask him about his other company when I had the chance? No wonder I'm such a loser . . . wait, how can I fix this? From now on, I'm taking five minutes before each important meeting and writing a list of things to do so I don't mess up again. Great idea!"
2. Write down things about yourself of which you are proud. If necessary, start with small things, such as good personal habits. Keep writing until you improve your opinion.
For example, "I might be fat, but I brush my teeth regularly. I'm eating more vegetables these days. I haven't gotten angry at my kids for a month. I'm earning more money this year. I'm helping Joe with his drinking problem . . . ."
3. If you cannot improve your opinion of yourself, the solution lies below your consciousness. Read Dianetics: The Evolution of a Science (free online copy at www.dianetics-theevolutionofascience.org) to learn how you can find and erase the roots of irrational thoughts.
Good Manners Are Key to Your Success
Do
you like people who are rude to you? Do you mind if someone
interrupts you? Are you happy when people ignore you?
Of course not. No one likes bad manners.
People with bad manners are rejected. They do not get the good jobs or the promotions. Their businesses do not succeed.
People with good manners are accepted. They are liked and supported. They have the friends, the luck and the success.
"In a culture, manners are the lubrication that ease the frictions of social contacts." -- L. Ron Hubbard
When you improve your social conduct, you improve your chances for success. You earn the support, respect and popularity you need to succeed.
12 Examples of Good Manners
Good manners vary from one culture to another. The following examples apply to most circumstances.
1. Be polite to everyone you meet. You will never regret being too polite, but you might regret being rude. For example, when you go on a sales call or job interview, be courteous to receptionists and assistants as they can affect your chances of succeeding.
2. Use the magic words as often as possible: "Please," "Excuse me," "Sorry" and "Thank you."
3. Use good manners in all communications. Examples:
* Return telephone and e-mail messages within 24 hours.
* Do not use swear words or vulgar words.
* If you receive a rude message, do not respond until you can be polite.
* Do not interrupt people.
* Make sure people are ready to listen to you before you start talking.
* Talk less than 50% of the time.
4. Leave generous tips for food servers, luggage handlers, auto valets, hairdressers or barbers who do their jobs.
5. Use good manners as a driver. Weaving in and out of heavy traffic and cutting in front of other cars only gains you a few seconds of time. If you are courteous, patient and calm, you arrive safely and more relaxed.
6. Do not blow your nose, use toothpicks or perform other bodily activities in front of guests or people you respect. Never smoke around a non-smoker.
7. Show your appreciation at every opportunity, even for small things. "Thank you for returning my call." "Your advice has been very helpful." "I appreciate your taking the time to meet with me."
8. Arrive early for appointments. When you arrive late, you appear to be disrespectful, disorganized or both.
9. A good sense of humor is good manners. However, avoid all jokes about race, disability, sex and so on. Tell jokes about yourself or pass on humorous stories that anyone would enjoy.
10. If someone treats you with bad manners, do not lower yourself to the same level. Smooth out the friction with your best manners. For example, when one politician publicly criticizes another, the smarter politician is polite. For example, "Senator, I respect you too much to respond to that."
11. Before starting important conversations, meals or meetings, turn off your cell phone. Ignoring people while you chat on your cell phone is disrespectful. You can probably leave your cell phone off for hours with no lasting harm.
12. Do not try to show off or prove you are more important than others. This is called "one-upmanship" and is poor manners. For example, a friend is excited about meeting an important scientist. You immediately "top" him and tell about the time when you met a much more important scientist.
Of course not. No one likes bad manners.
People with bad manners are rejected. They do not get the good jobs or the promotions. Their businesses do not succeed.
People with good manners are accepted. They are liked and supported. They have the friends, the luck and the success.
"In a culture, manners are the lubrication that ease the frictions of social contacts." -- L. Ron Hubbard
When you improve your social conduct, you improve your chances for success. You earn the support, respect and popularity you need to succeed.
12 Examples of Good Manners
Good manners vary from one culture to another. The following examples apply to most circumstances.
1. Be polite to everyone you meet. You will never regret being too polite, but you might regret being rude. For example, when you go on a sales call or job interview, be courteous to receptionists and assistants as they can affect your chances of succeeding.
2. Use the magic words as often as possible: "Please," "Excuse me," "Sorry" and "Thank you."
3. Use good manners in all communications. Examples:
* Return telephone and e-mail messages within 24 hours.
* Do not use swear words or vulgar words.
* If you receive a rude message, do not respond until you can be polite.
* Do not interrupt people.
* Make sure people are ready to listen to you before you start talking.
* Talk less than 50% of the time.
4. Leave generous tips for food servers, luggage handlers, auto valets, hairdressers or barbers who do their jobs.
5. Use good manners as a driver. Weaving in and out of heavy traffic and cutting in front of other cars only gains you a few seconds of time. If you are courteous, patient and calm, you arrive safely and more relaxed.
6. Do not blow your nose, use toothpicks or perform other bodily activities in front of guests or people you respect. Never smoke around a non-smoker.
7. Show your appreciation at every opportunity, even for small things. "Thank you for returning my call." "Your advice has been very helpful." "I appreciate your taking the time to meet with me."
8. Arrive early for appointments. When you arrive late, you appear to be disrespectful, disorganized or both.
9. A good sense of humor is good manners. However, avoid all jokes about race, disability, sex and so on. Tell jokes about yourself or pass on humorous stories that anyone would enjoy.
10. If someone treats you with bad manners, do not lower yourself to the same level. Smooth out the friction with your best manners. For example, when one politician publicly criticizes another, the smarter politician is polite. For example, "Senator, I respect you too much to respond to that."
11. Before starting important conversations, meals or meetings, turn off your cell phone. Ignoring people while you chat on your cell phone is disrespectful. You can probably leave your cell phone off for hours with no lasting harm.
12. Do not try to show off or prove you are more important than others. This is called "one-upmanship" and is poor manners. For example, a friend is excited about meeting an important scientist. You immediately "top" him and tell about the time when you met a much more important scientist.
The Secret of Efficiency
Do
you ever feel overworked, overloaded or overwhelmed? Is this
because you have too much to do? Because your boss is too
demanding? Because your work goals are too large?
Why can some people produce twice as much as others? For example, Jane not only handles three kids, but works 30 hours per week and runs a small business from her home office. Jane's house is always clean and she cooks incredible meals for her family.
Jill, on the other hand, has one daughter, produces no income, can't keep up with her housework and prefers pizza or Chinese food delivery for dinners.
Both Jane and Jill are good mothers, but why are they so different? Are you more like Jane or Jill?
If you want to be efficient and get more done in less time, you simply rid yourself of two bad habits and form one good habit.
Two Bad Habits
1. The first bad habit is to look at a piece of work you are supposed to do-a letter, program, interoffice communication, task assignment, request, whatever-and put it aside to do later.
Instead of acting, you read it, digest it, think about doing it, consider the problems involved, sigh, and put it down to do later. Nothing is accomplished. A total waste of time.
2. The second bad habit is taking a piece of work, deciding you do not want to do it and referring it to someone else, even though it is your job to do. The other person eventually sends it back to you. A total waste of your time and the other person's time.
One Good Habit
"Do it Now."
"One of the best ways to cut your work in half is not to do it twice."
"If you do every piece of work that comes your way WHEN it comes your way and not after a while, if you always take the initiative and take action, not refer it, you never get any traffic back. . ."
"In short, the way to get rid of traffic is to do it, not to refer it; anything referred has to be read by you again, digested again, and handled again; so never refer traffic, just do it so it's done."
"So if you are truly a lover of ease, the sort of person who yawns comfortably and wears holes in heels resting them on desks, if your true ambition is one long bout of spring fever, then you'll do as I suggest and handle everything that comes your way when it comes and not later; and you'll never refer anything to anybody that you yourself can do promptly."
"Do it when you see it and do it yourself." -- L. Ron Hubbard
Recommendation
You can form the "do-it-now" habit by making yourself do it now, every time you can. And the best time to get the "do-it-now" habit is, of course, RIGHT NOW!
1. Take a stack of papers or any kind of cluttered mess that you need to handle.
2. Read or examine the first item.
3. Deal with it.
If the item has no current use, file it, store it or throw it away.
If you need to take action, do it right now. Persist until the job is completely DONE.
If you dislike the work involved, it is even more important that you do it right now.
". . . take the initiative and take action . . . ."
4. Remember the rewards of the do-it-now habit.
If you do your work in half the time, how will you spend the extra time? What new activity could you do that would increase your productivity? What would be fun to do if you had some extra time on your hands?
Give it a try!
Why can some people produce twice as much as others? For example, Jane not only handles three kids, but works 30 hours per week and runs a small business from her home office. Jane's house is always clean and she cooks incredible meals for her family.
Jill, on the other hand, has one daughter, produces no income, can't keep up with her housework and prefers pizza or Chinese food delivery for dinners.
Both Jane and Jill are good mothers, but why are they so different? Are you more like Jane or Jill?
If you want to be efficient and get more done in less time, you simply rid yourself of two bad habits and form one good habit.
Two Bad Habits
1. The first bad habit is to look at a piece of work you are supposed to do-a letter, program, interoffice communication, task assignment, request, whatever-and put it aside to do later.
Instead of acting, you read it, digest it, think about doing it, consider the problems involved, sigh, and put it down to do later. Nothing is accomplished. A total waste of time.
2. The second bad habit is taking a piece of work, deciding you do not want to do it and referring it to someone else, even though it is your job to do. The other person eventually sends it back to you. A total waste of your time and the other person's time.
One Good Habit
"Do it Now."
"One of the best ways to cut your work in half is not to do it twice."
"If you do every piece of work that comes your way WHEN it comes your way and not after a while, if you always take the initiative and take action, not refer it, you never get any traffic back. . ."
"In short, the way to get rid of traffic is to do it, not to refer it; anything referred has to be read by you again, digested again, and handled again; so never refer traffic, just do it so it's done."
"So if you are truly a lover of ease, the sort of person who yawns comfortably and wears holes in heels resting them on desks, if your true ambition is one long bout of spring fever, then you'll do as I suggest and handle everything that comes your way when it comes and not later; and you'll never refer anything to anybody that you yourself can do promptly."
"Do it when you see it and do it yourself." -- L. Ron Hubbard
Recommendation
You can form the "do-it-now" habit by making yourself do it now, every time you can. And the best time to get the "do-it-now" habit is, of course, RIGHT NOW!
1. Take a stack of papers or any kind of cluttered mess that you need to handle.
2. Read or examine the first item.
3. Deal with it.
If the item has no current use, file it, store it or throw it away.
If you need to take action, do it right now. Persist until the job is completely DONE.
If you dislike the work involved, it is even more important that you do it right now.
". . . take the initiative and take action . . . ."
4. Remember the rewards of the do-it-now habit.
If you do your work in half the time, how will you spend the extra time? What new activity could you do that would increase your productivity? What would be fun to do if you had some extra time on your hands?
Give it a try!
Improve Your Health and Happiness
You may have heard that to succeed, you need to adjust yourself to the world around you. Examples:
"You'd better get used to it as that's the way it is." "To be happy, you must compromise." "Don't make waves!"
Yet, to succeed, you must take a different approach.
"Man succeeds because he adjusts his environment to him, not by adjusting himself to the environment." -- L. Ron Hubbard
You decide what you want and how you want it. You take an active role. You change the world around you.
Think of the most successful people you know. Do they mold themselves to fit in? Or do they change the world around them?
As well as determining your success, your ability to adjust your environment also determines your health and happiness.
"So long as an individual maintains his own belief in his ability to handle the physical universe and organisms about him and to control them if necessary or to work in harmony with them, and to make himself competent over and among the physical universe of his environment, he remains healthy, stable and balanced and cheerful."-- L. Ron Hubbard
Jack and Jill
Jack tries to get along and not cause trouble. His neighbor plays loud rock-and-roll music all night long, so Jack buys ear plugs. Jack hates leaving his apartment as the building lobby is full of boxes and junk; he just steps around the mess. His co-worker makes Jack pick him up for work each day with no compensation, ". . . since you drive near my house anyway." Each year, he develops some kind of illness or needs an operation. After 25 years at the same company, Jack is only making $22 per hour, but he does not mind as his company gives him good health insurance. At the age of 51, Jack gets cancer and dies.
Jill moves into Jack's vacant apartment and can't sleep because of the loud music. She calls the neighbor and works out an agreement so the neighbor plays music all day while she works, but won't at night. Jill convinces this neighbor and a few of the other tenants to spend a few hours cleaning up the lobby and the entry; they even wash the sidewalk and plant some flowers. Even though Jill has earned several management promotions and pay increases at her company, she decides to start her own business and makes it successful. She soon buys the apartment building and takes over the top floor for herself. Jill is never ill and at the age of 78, still spends a few hours each week working at her company.
Obviously, Jack adjusts himself to the environment while Jill adjusts the environment to herself. Are you more like Jack or Jill?
Recommendations
1. Decide to take over your world and adjust your world to your needs and wants.
2. Make a list of everything around you that you would like to change.
Examples
Clean the house
Change my car oil
Tear out all the weeds in my garden
Exercise daily and lose 10 pounds
Reorganize my desk
Make people stop dropping in to chat while I'm working
Call the city to fix the broken street light
3. Select the easiest items on your list and go change them. Then change the next easiest items and so on.
4. Constantly change and improve the world around you. Never settle back, give up or "accept reality." Make steady progress while maintaining your control of the parts you have already conquered.
If you continue to increase your control of the elements in your environment, you become healthier, happier and more successful.
"You'd better get used to it as that's the way it is." "To be happy, you must compromise." "Don't make waves!"
Yet, to succeed, you must take a different approach.
"Man succeeds because he adjusts his environment to him, not by adjusting himself to the environment." -- L. Ron Hubbard
You decide what you want and how you want it. You take an active role. You change the world around you.
Think of the most successful people you know. Do they mold themselves to fit in? Or do they change the world around them?
As well as determining your success, your ability to adjust your environment also determines your health and happiness.
"So long as an individual maintains his own belief in his ability to handle the physical universe and organisms about him and to control them if necessary or to work in harmony with them, and to make himself competent over and among the physical universe of his environment, he remains healthy, stable and balanced and cheerful."-- L. Ron Hubbard
Jack and Jill
Jack tries to get along and not cause trouble. His neighbor plays loud rock-and-roll music all night long, so Jack buys ear plugs. Jack hates leaving his apartment as the building lobby is full of boxes and junk; he just steps around the mess. His co-worker makes Jack pick him up for work each day with no compensation, ". . . since you drive near my house anyway." Each year, he develops some kind of illness or needs an operation. After 25 years at the same company, Jack is only making $22 per hour, but he does not mind as his company gives him good health insurance. At the age of 51, Jack gets cancer and dies.
Jill moves into Jack's vacant apartment and can't sleep because of the loud music. She calls the neighbor and works out an agreement so the neighbor plays music all day while she works, but won't at night. Jill convinces this neighbor and a few of the other tenants to spend a few hours cleaning up the lobby and the entry; they even wash the sidewalk and plant some flowers. Even though Jill has earned several management promotions and pay increases at her company, she decides to start her own business and makes it successful. She soon buys the apartment building and takes over the top floor for herself. Jill is never ill and at the age of 78, still spends a few hours each week working at her company.
Obviously, Jack adjusts himself to the environment while Jill adjusts the environment to herself. Are you more like Jack or Jill?
Recommendations
1. Decide to take over your world and adjust your world to your needs and wants.
2. Make a list of everything around you that you would like to change.
Examples
Clean the house
Change my car oil
Tear out all the weeds in my garden
Exercise daily and lose 10 pounds
Reorganize my desk
Make people stop dropping in to chat while I'm working
Call the city to fix the broken street light
3. Select the easiest items on your list and go change them. Then change the next easiest items and so on.
4. Constantly change and improve the world around you. Never settle back, give up or "accept reality." Make steady progress while maintaining your control of the parts you have already conquered.
If you continue to increase your control of the elements in your environment, you become healthier, happier and more successful.
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